OD 3: School? Not so much.

Tuesday, December. 03/12/2013. 08:34 am.

School.

If you read my previous entry you should've realized and began asking "why didn't you go to school on Monday?"

Here's the thing: I'm homeschooled. But with a little twist. Its a homeschooling community. Not like the usual homeschool where the teacher comes to your house to teach you, I actually go to school but in here we call it study house. Not school. But only at Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday (pretty nice, huh? You bet it is). The purpose of this community is like a second chance for physically or mentally handicaped kids or for kids that dropped out of school.

I dropped out.

I've been in this community for almost 3 years. From grade 9 to now grade 11. There's not much to talk about this. They say this community gives you another chance at education, but all I feel is this place is heaven AND hell at the same time.

The day I dropped out, I died a little inside.

The reason I dropped out of school? I'm gonna tell you but I'll try my best to make it not look like a cheap sad story or dramatic tragedy.

As a ridiculously, hilariously, unpopular kid, I've been bullied since the first day of entering junior highschool. But despite my unpopularity, I have a reputation of being the scariest kid when I'm angry. I have this reputation since I was in elementary school. I always back down when I'm bullied, I never fight back. But when I do, they're gonna call the teachers. Someone WILL get hurt.

After those years, I finally get tired and sick of these bullying. The day was Thursday if I remember correctly. I was in 9th grade. I was bullied the whole morning. I lost it. I see red. Eyes watery, hands shaking, breathing heavily. I reach for my pencil case and pulled out a scissor. I walked to the back of the class and I stabbed a student.

One, two, three, four, five times I stabbed him in the back. Some of the boys instantly got up and pushed me to the wall. A girl called the teacher. I cried. The rest got the unfortunate kid out of the class to get first aid.

14:05 / 02:05 pm. Just finished school, waiting to be picked up home. Now, let's continue. I was called to the principal's office. They called my parents. I knew I'm in big trouble (of course I do). My mom cried. Everything is blurry. I don't remember much after that. Then I got home with my parents. They lectured me. The next day, they told me I was kicked out. Upon hearing that news, I died a little inside. I have to take a 180 degree turn. I left all my friend but kept in contact with some of them, Un-friend them on socmed because they all gave me death threats (which I know are never true, but still... yeah). Its something I wanted all this time, a fresh start. But I never knew it has such a staggering price. The timing was somehow perfect. I don't want to be bullied anymore, but not like this! I remained at home for a week, not going to school, not anymore. Then here I am.

14:42 / 02:42 pm. I got home and just ate cold pizza (cold pizza? Yay or nay?) and unpacked my "school" stuff. About to go for a swim.

21:25 / 09:25 pm. Just got back from swimming, took a bath, played some ps2 with my bro, watched some tv, played some psp. Y'know, that kind of stuff.

Continuing on.

Here in the homeschooling community, as I said earlier, is my new heaven and hell.

The factors that makes this place heaven:
•as I said earlier, only 3 days of school in a week.
•no uniforms! This way, I can use my jacket. Yea, I like wearing jackets. Going out without one makes me feel like I'm going naked, even though I'm wearing a shirt and jeans.
•you are permitted to use electronic devices (at least, I'm permitted to do so) in class as long as the teacher isn't teaching (the teacher is still in the class though, watching us).
•air conditioned room. Its cold as fuck in there. I like it.
•if I'm not in the mood for studying, I can use my earphone and still stay in class.

Pretty nice, eh? Hahaha. At least I can get outta my house to socialize for once in a while.

And now the factors that makes it hell:
•so many annoying kids with autism. I don't blame them, but sometimes they're annoying as fuck.
•if not kids with autism, there's another group of people, annoying teenagers that comes to school just to play with their boy/girlfriends.
•lack of information about the next meetings schedule.

Its a lethal combination of annoying things (for me, anyway)! Fuck!

Wheew, that's all I guess. Its pretty late now (23:05 / 11:05 pm) and I'm tired as shit (not really) from all the swimming this evening. Ciao!

-Aex

05/12/2013 08:15 am. Fixed some minor typos.