Monday, February. 09/02/2015 22:21
Hey, boys and girls. A little something: my elbow was bitten by either a caterpillar or a centipede, didn't care which one, and it burns. Don't worry, I killed it. Its been burning for 3 hours now and I decided to put ice on it, so I'm writing this only with my right hand because my left hand is holding the ice cube.
Today, school was absolute shit. I had to dash through the rain and flood on my way to and from school. And there was Adit being the absolute trash of a talker that he is. I intended to finish things quick and go home but, yeah, it was raining. It rained so hard you might think someone poured buckets of water on top of you alone. Lucky thing is, I get to go home 3 hours earlier because it has been raining nonstop from 3 in the morning until 8 at night, which was 2 hours ago. The teachers feared their house might get flooded.
When I got home, I took a bath. Yes, I took a bath at 1 o'clock and decided not to take a bath again later in the evening.
Ah, yes. Uncle Eko stayed at my house since Friday night and have left earlier today at 7 tonight. He's a car dealer of some sort. I've never written anything about him in here before, mostly because he usually stayed for less than a day to pick up cars but this time he stayed for 4 days and it was a first for me.
The reason I brought him up is because of his occupation. It dawned on me that this thing he does is actually the same with what my colleagues are always talking about, including Adit. (Ugh...) Its about making profit, and it doesn't require a high degree of education. It only needs the supply demanded and some capital. Of course, I might be wrong, but screw that.
Heh, you know, I always come to school never really expecting or judging anything but when my acquaintances came to class I almost always thought to myself this despite my half-assed works at school, "I came to school because I cared about the things that actually fucking mattered, unlike these guys."
But I was looking with one eye closed. When I really think about it, these people that I labeled as useless and stupid are actually leagues ahead of me. I thought about school, getting good scores, graduating. They thought about getting a livelihood, university, hobby. I never thought that far ahead.
22:58
Sorry, I had to take a break from writing because I don't know what to make of the above paragraph. I'm so ashamed. Damn it all. Let's move on.
Recently mom took me for a tour in one of the university she entered me. I was in a bad mood for the whole trip to the location because she kept talking about it, knowing that I DON'T want to talk about it, but I left kind of relieved. Still stressed though. Whenever I thought about it, it only freaks me out.
Let's call the place UB. The place was nice overall, its close to a shopping district- actually, I think its one with the area. Its also close to a sports center, and I could walk for a few minutes to my dad's office. The thing is, the university majors that I wanted to take, or rather, my parents encouraged me to take because my former self is so damn intelligent, is not available there. Architecture and/or Civil Engineering.
A few days after the trip, my parents had my personal documents and academic scores legalized (legalisir KTP dan rapot sekolah) to be sent to the universities. Mom picked my hobby. What the hell. Reading? Barely. Ugh.
And shortly after that I had to make a choice regarding the major I wanted to take. So here's the story:
"My parents are going to visit grandpa's grave along with the other relatives whose existence I'm not aware of. With the date of their departure and the university's score judging entry (or whatever that is) closing in, mom wanted me to make a decision. A premature decision about the university major I'm gonna take. I thought "fuck it" and picked Mass Media Management only because I could become a freelance photographer and a paid blogger. My dad added Management to the majors I'm taking. Regular economy management, as a back up in case I fucked up being a freelance worker so I could become at least a manager like my dad. He did that without my consent, but what do I care, right? As if I have any say against my dad regarding this seemingly important decision that could possibly dictate the direction of my life. I didn't achieve the passing grade for architecture and civil engineering anyway, so, whatever."
Since that day onward I began to write more frequently since internet connection is rather scarce for me. At home I write random pieces of stories that I might finish, but the chance drops significantly because of my laptop and PSP. I kept playing offline games. At school I write almost all my notes and exercises twice. The first one is a shitty draft littered with random drawings and I used slangs and acronyms a lot.
The second one is a proper note, and maybe an overkill because I rewrite everything and added extra stuff in it. I used big and proper words, added some relevant informations from my old text book, and I tried (and I mean really fucking tried) to make my writing look good. Because I'm telling you, it looks like shit.
I did that, thinking it would train my hand to do better at writing and hopefully, drawing. I saw short videos on Instagram of people drawing and they did it in one go. Draw a head? Fucking draw a head, and without doing any line twice. If I wanted to make just a single line, I would take me 5 pen strokes and it wouldn't get anywhere near straight. It would look jagged. I mean, fuck, man.
*sigh* I got a little bit emotional. Moving on. Uh... every time I say something along the lines of "moving along, lets move on." or whatever, it actually goes further into the past or around the past, since I write these a week later than I had planned and because I have such a bad memory regarding timelines. I might screw up and wrote "moving along, let's move on." instead of "last week." Seriously, I remember the events, but not the time.
On Tuesday (03/02/2015 hehey I remember this.) I delivered the keychains I bought from Wonosobo for the whole AriaFams to Audrey. On that day, the moment I woke up I thought to myself "get your ass to her house and deliver the fucking gifts. It matters not whether you met her or not." and with that set in stone, I went swimming in the evening and walked to her house after that.
When I was undressing myself *ooh, suggestive description* I realized my swimming goggle is gone. I asked the pool lifeguards about it but they didn't find anything. I realized if I left it at home I would've found it before I departed, and if I left it at the pool someone would've found it and took it home with them. I searched through my bag and used my old goggles and carried on swimming. I told dad straight up about it before he said anything because he always get upset over small stuff like this.
After swimming, I walked to Audrey's house. I walked like I never walked before. I was still tired from the pool, but I was determined to deliver the keychains to Audrey. Mission complete? Pretty much. I didn't met her personally but I think met her father at her front door. I'm not sure if its her father, though. He's an old man, that's for sure. I gave the keychains to him, and he asked for my name. I said my name is Axel. Sorry, Axel. :/
The thing is, there's almost no reaction on the internet. I became a stalker as I usually do but I found nothing. Well, at least I don't have to worry about those keychains getting lost on my place.
The reason I delivered them is that I'm going to university, and my free time wouldn't be as much as it is now. Hell, I might not be able to swim once a week anymore. And so I gave it before my chance is up. The other reason is because she has a significantly better chance to distribute the gifts around AriaFams. She has more time, even though she is swamped with all her school work, she's still going to be around for the next 2 years. My time will be up in September later this year.
So, Audrey, if you read this, and I hope you do, please give them to the other members. Its okay to do it at your own pace, you have all the time in the world.
With that said, for some time I had a feeling that the keychains didn't actually get to her. Mind you, I didn't gave it to her directly but her father or whoever. But I had faith. Its all that mattered.
Sunday, February. 15/02/2015 23:30
Hey, what's up, boys and girls? Doing fine, I hope.
So a few hours ago, I got told by mom that there's gonna be a 3 day tryouts starting tomorrow, she got a message from school officials. I thought, "what tha fack why didn't they tell me earlier!?" So I got online and asked my classmates around about it. They knew about it.
I have this bad habit of going home 2 hours before I am actually permitted to go home on Fridays. Hell, I mean, why the fuck not? If there's something that's actually meaningful to do, I would stay. But there's not, so I went home without the teacher's permission. I do this every Friday since my first week here. My classmates usually stay because they have people to talk to or whatever activities that they do after school. They told me they got notified before going home, and I didn't know because I left 2 hours earlier.
Yeah, so, I got mad. I got mad at my classmates because of my bad habit. Fuck logic, right? And now I'm typing this at my bed.
The actual reason why I write these things now is because I got reminded of my junior highschool days. I'm gonna write a small portion of it now, here, because it made me laugh. I originally planned to write this on an Untimed post, but fuck it. I bet if my brother saw me laughing he would think me crazy for laughing at night for no reason. Also, this might make no sense to you boys and girls because it was kind of my junior highschool's tradition. And an Indonesian thing.
Again, this might not make any sense. You've been warned.
I got mad and tried to sleep. I tried to think of happy thoughts and suddenly a word pops in my head "KUWAT!" And I started giggling. There was a guy whose name was Bintang and his father's name was Kuwat Santoso. There's another guy whose name is Alif Brahmasta and his father's name is Suparwanto. There's also this other guy whose name I cannot remember but I know his nickname, Kiki, and his father's name was Sape'i something. We used to call and make fun of other people's parent's name as insults and sometimes its pretty damn funny. So Kiki used to shout "KUWAAAT!" and Bintang would in turn scream "SA-PE-I-DERMAAAN!" As if he's calling out Spiderman. I would laugh all the time, I just giggled by thinking about it. Alif would also do the same and Bintang would usually counter it by putting both his fist up and doing an acapella of Superman's theme song, or he would yell "SUUUPAR!" Or he'll just do a quick "Suparwanto!" And walk away. Kiki was fine, he didn't get provoked that much but Alif and Bintang was like cats and dogs. They're close, and thought of it as some kind of 'provocative joke'. There was one time that Bintang greeted me and I said "what?" He then kind of raged, "the fuck, man, I was just saying hi!" It was a misunderstanding that was quickly straightened, but since that day, Kiki and Alif would sometimes say "Ku..." whenever Bintang shows up and he would call out both their parent's name in return. Those were the good days...
Saturday, February. 28/02/2015 22:47
What's up, you guys? I've been better. No, I'm not sick, I'm just a bit stressed. I hope you boys and girls stay healthy and are doing better than me.
Wow, quite the time gap, huh? Its almost two weeks since the last portion of this entry.
I promised myself to not write anything during Exam Weeks, and I went through two exam weeks in a row. Back to back. Oh, man. I don't wanna talk about those times, seriously. But hey! I got through. The reason I don't wanna write during those periods is because of mood swings. I'm afraid my mood swings during exam weeks would alter my memories and made me write lies and such.
I still write, but only time markers and reminders. Now, I'll go over the last couple of weeks in order. There's not much to tell about my daily life, but I remember some events that made lasting impressions.
Monday, 16th February. The first day of the third tryouts week. I got told by the teacher I passed the second tryouts week by a small number, which was 65/55 minimum. I was so happy, maybe because I didn't pass my first tryouts week with ~45/55 minimum as my final score. If I remember correctly, Izmy got 67/55. Naufal got the same as me. Adit got 62/55. That 3 point difference with Adit's score makes the victory all the more enjoyable, even if we're not competing. If I didn't pass, my spirit would probably be broken and I'll fail the third tryouts week as well. I'm still waiting for the results.
Thursday, 19th February. Lunar new years. Year of the Goat in the Chinese calendar. One day off for everyone. While everyone enjoys their vacation, my family went on a trip to pick up my grandmother from mom's side and take her to the hospital. I didn't really know or understand what was going on, but I think grandma is gonna have her second breast cancer surgery. I got all worried because, well, my grandpa from dad's side passed away 3 months ago. I don't know how she's doing right now. I just hope grandma's okay. Grandma lives temporarily in my mom's brother's house. In this house, after such a long time, I finally meet Gilang again, my cousin from mom's side. When I was little I looked at him as a role model, even though I never knew what he was like beside his looks. Now, my brother and I are taller than him. Its funny, I used to think of him as the tallest man in the world. I wished I knew more about him than just about how he finished college recently.
Monday, 23rd February. For some reason, I woke up very early. How do I know? My brother haven't departed for school when I went out. Usually mom, dad, and my bro have already gone to their workplace/school by the time I wake up. Yeah, I'm not a morning person. Nothing special that day except for the local store near school closing down. I never had breakfast at home, always at school along with lunch. With my food source gone, I'm really gonna have to chew my gum longer.
Tuesday, 24th February. I apologized to Jacinda.
Big surprise, huh? Believe me, I was surprised too. By her appearance and by what I did.
That day was the second day of mid semester exam. I've finished my physics test but I'm sure I'll fail it. I don't want to turn it in to the teacher yet, so instead of checking my answers one more time, I used my spare paper- which was where I'm supposed to do my calculations, to draw doodles. I got bored, and I wanted to go home. I took a quick glance at the glass door behind me and I saw a familiar figure walking by. I gave my worksheet to the teacher and pack up. As I was getting my stuff, Jogi went outside and suddenly it seemed like he talked to a girl. A voice I recognize.
...This is turning into a romance novel.
Anyway, I went out to the lift. I passed a couple of classrooms and in the one next to the lift, I saw Jacinda sitting near the door. I approached her and said sorry about, you know, that time. It wasn't even a proper apology. I didn't shook her hand, I said it as fast as possible. That was so bad. So bad. Ugh. And like a dumbshit, I asked her "Do you accept my apology?" With the straightest poker face I could make. She said yes, and I nodded. Then I walked away and went home.
I couldn't stop thinking about her until I went home. She was really beautiful, you know. And for being the short girl that she is, she actually got really nice, round, big boobs. I mean, dude, that's really something else. I guess what was making those things really noticeable was her clothing. Although I knew since the first time I met her, her big boobs would catch anyone's eyes regardless of what she's wearing, even more if she's not wearing anything. She was wearing normal highschool uniform with all the button up shirt, the knee length skrit, and all that make up. She was really different from all the folks around her. We don't wear uniforms, and girls don't use make ups.
Now, I was originally gonna write about a curse I had, but I'll have to cut it short here because I'm gonna post this. Its the end of the month, afterall.
I call it, The J Curse.
I always have bad relationships with girls with J as their initials. Jessica and Janice in junior highschool, Jacinda in highschool, I really hope Jane from AriaFams wouldn't be my enemy. And I also hope that my encounter with Jacinda somehow ended that curse.
Anyway, aside from all those talk about boobs, I got nothing. I'll end this for now. See you later, at the end of March.
-Aex
Also, as I was just about to post this, my teacher told me that my scores for Math, Physics, Biology, and Chemistry passed. How amazing is that!? I mean, what the actual fuck, man!? Wow! Although my Civics, Indonesian, and English scores are yet to be announced, I'm happy enough.
